Beautiful In Its Time

These delicate little flowers grow on a shamrock plant. There are purple shamrocks with light purple flowers and green ones with white flowers.

They are very active plants - each day the leaves open in the morning and close when it gets dark. My green shamrock became overgrown, so I cut it back and as you can see, it is already blooming and baby leaves are quickly growing back! 

The leaves will last awhile, but the flowers bloom delicately then wither quite soon. Grass and flowers of the field are often used in the Bible to remind us of the brevity of life. For example:

 ^"13As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
¹⁴ for he knows how we are formed,
    he remembers that we are dust.
¹⁵ The life of mortals is like grass,
    they flourish like a flower of the field;
¹⁶ the wind blows over it and it is gone,
    and its place remembers it no more.
¹⁷ But from everlasting to everlasting
    the Lord’s love is with those who fear him,
    and his righteousness with their children’s children—
¹⁸ with those who keep his covenant
    and remember to obey his precepts."  (Psalm 103:13-18)

 and again here:

²³ "For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. ²⁴ For,

“All people are like grass,
    and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
the grass withers and the flowers fall,
²⁵     but the word of the Lord endures forever.”

And this is the word that was preached to you."  (1 Peter 1:23-25)

Like grass, people seem to flourish without effort for a time. It's quite hardy - grass regrows when mowed or chewed down, and springs back when stepped on. And flowers of the field are plentiful and beautiful:

“Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these." (Luke 12:27)

 

It's humbling to be compared to grass, yet in our hearts we sense the truth. As time goes by we notice that people pass on, but the world continues. 

 

However the word of the Lord is not temporary, like our lives. It endures forever, and so does His love. We can take hold of something more powerful and lasting that makes part of us imperishable. We can read God's word and seek His love, taking within ourselves something that endures and is everlasting.

 

We each have our own beauty in our time - just like the flowers of the field, just like my shamrocks.

"He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end." (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

Eternity is set in our hearts for a reason, so that we will reach for and take hold of that which lasts.

 

* References are from the NIV
 

 

 

The Sure Foundation For Your Times

I studied Isaiah 33 for awhile, but there was a section I couldn't understand. Since the pandemic (Covid 19) started, it suggests new meaning to me which I would like to share. Here it is (Isaiah 33:10-14 NIV):

10 “Now will I arise,” says the Lord.
    “Now will I be exalted;
    now will I be lifted up.
11 You conceive chaff,
    you give birth to straw;
    your breath is a fire that consumes you.
12 The peoples will be burned to ashes;
    like cut thornbushes they will be set ablaze.”

13 You who are far away, hear what I have done;
    you who are near, acknowledge my power!
14 The sinners in Zion are terrified;
    trembling grips the godless:
“Who of us can dwell with the consuming fire?

    Who of us can dwell with everlasting burning?”

The phrase "your breath is a fire that consumes you" makes me think of this pandemic, the virus is like a fire that takes our breath away.

Is it perhaps a judgement on our global condition, that humans have of late conceived and birthed so many ideas that are not of substance - but worthless and "flammable" the way chaff and straw are flammable shells with no nutrition? I don't mean it's a judgement on individuals who are ill, because it refers to "the peoples" being set ablaze like cut thornbushes (eg. high contagion among everyone) and being "burned to ashes" (eg. many consumed, many cremations). The virus seems indifferent to who it infects.

I imagine everyone across the world will hear of what is happening (see Isaiah 33:13). Those in places more affected will notice changes that seem surreal in their countries. A short time ago, I could not have imagined anything that could cause such profound changes as these in such a short time:

• Vast economies throughout the world slowed and shutdown. 
• Huge cities quickly locked down and halted, except for essential services.
• Massive retailers and industries indefinietly closed.
• Sporting empires worldwide with delayed and cancelled events.
• The entertainment industry unable to film programs and movies, and theatres closed.
• The hospitality industry with empty rooms and vacant buildings.
• Weddings, funerals, conferences, concerts, churches, families - gatherings of all types put on hold.
• Restaurants and bars closed (except for drive throughs and delivery).
• Schools and universities closed, students learning online or at home.
• Airlines and transportation curtailed, highways empty.
• Cruises and travel - formerly a privilege, now a potential source of infection and stranding.
• Places renowned for longevity suddenly dangerous places for the aged to be.
• Powerful people equally as vulnerable as others to this disease.
• Stock markets and oil prices plummeting and erratic.

In short, the most popular - and populous - places and businesses suddenly became places to avoid. And in a world where the "outgoing" are often celebrated, people are suddenly encouraged to "stay home"!

Nothing I have ever witnessed has had such rapid and widespread influence over all the nations of the world, and all the institutions of power within it.

And as a result, people are reaching out to the Lord. It's good news in Isaiah 33:10 that the Lord says He will arise, be exalted and lifted up. I imagine there are many who, in their fear due to sickness or circumstance, will look to the Lord like never before. Perhaps some in their final hours,  but also I hope many who will recover and move forward with new respect for the Lord. I hope it changes this generation in a lasting and positive way by generating renewed interest in and respect for Him. By reaching out to God in this troubling time, people are acknowledging His power (see Isaiah 33:13)

I also hope we will recognize how the Lord works this for good in the lives of us believers. Ways he guides us, strengthens us, restores us, comforts us, changes us, and cares for us through this time and beyond. Isaiah 33:6 says:

6 

6 6       He will be the sure foundation for your times,
          a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge;
          the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure.

This is in the same chapter (Isaiah 33) as the other verses, so it is referring to these times, our times. The chapter is titled "Distress and Help" in the NIV Bible, and also mentions a time beyond this. So take heart, the Lord is with us, is drawing many to Himself, and is a sure foundation for us in these present times. 

Are All God's Gifts To Us Spiritual?

I have long had a penchant for school and office supplies. Gel pens, journals, calendars, computers, calculators, cute sticky notes - I regularly scan these aisles to see what new designs there are. 

It's true that most of this can be done digitally now, but the manual items still intrigue me. Maybe the "nouns" in our lives tell us something about ourselves, (besides how materialistic we are)!

From a young age preferences can often be seen toward certain objects, and also a disinterest in others. For example, I always loved toy animals but rarely played with dolls. Loved nature, was bored with kitchen utensils. So do these interests suggest our future jobs?

They could, but how the item is used is not always what attracts us. It may be more abstract, such as it's beauty, complexity, sleekness, orderliness, simplicity or newness. Does this mean we're materialistic if we like "things" so much?

Like an eager dog with a meaty bone, we can become possessive of our possessions. "Stuff" can trigger sins in us such as envy, greed, hoarding, overspending, debt, idolatry, theft, or selfishness. Should we then avoid the very things that excite us?

At times perhaps, but merely liking or enjoying something is part of life - it's a matter of degree. And also sometimes a matter of timing if our abilities change in the future.

Personally, I think we can learn about who God designed each of us to be by allowing ourselves to enjoy the material gifts He provides during our lives. All good things are from God, but when an item really touches your heart or shows up at a special time when it is especially appreciated - if you feel in your spirit it was sent to bless you, it probably was:

“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." (Matthew 7:9-12)

Disaster, With a Chance Of Rain.

One night I watched the news for a few minutes before bed, and felt so troubled afterward I wasn't sure I could sleep! Then I changed channels to check the weather forecast, and saw disasters happening around the world. Even when I avoid the news for awhile, I still hear heart wrenching stories from people around me, which add to my own worries. Yet I know the Lord wants me to love others, so how can I maintain faith and hope in the face of risks, disasters, and tragedies like we hear about each day? And how can I stop worrying when there is so much that can go wrong?

One way I interrupt troubled thoughts is to use this verse:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8 NIV. 

It helps to choose each word and think about something that fits that description. For example, can I think of something "admirable"?

Also I consider these 2 scriptures, and what they mean to me when read together:

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 NIV

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 NIV

So I remind myself that God rewards those who earnestly seek him, and works in all things for the good of those who love him. When facing a bad situation, I say to myself "God will bring good out of this." Granted, thinking it does not always make me 'feel' the certainty I would like to! But as I begin to align my thinking with the scriptures I will see examples of it happen, then more faith will grow.

It Happens In Thousands of Livingrooms!

"If you only had one week to live, and could write something guaranteed to impact 1000 people, what would you write?" This question was posed at a writers' workshop I attended, and this was my response: "I would write about Bible Study groups, and why I like them so much". As an introvert they really suit my style, and here is why:

• I like to learn, and as the name implies these studies focus in-depth on topics or sections of the Bible. Excellent study guides and videos are also available for leaders and members which encourage participation and consistency.
• Study groups are often small, which makes it comfortable to interact and share. It's fun to hear spiritual insights from others.
• It's encouraging to hear others pray aloud and pray with them. I learn from this too.
• Often groups meet in homes, which can strengthen friendships.
• Whether a collection is taken is up to the group, and many do not.
• There's always something new to study regardless how long a group meets, whether for a season or years.
• I find it easier to invite a friend to a small group than to a large church service. 
• For a change of pace, invite someone to share their testimony as a speaker.
• Bible studies are a way to find wisdom, solve problems, gain insight, and feel loved by God and others.

I don't know whether this will impact 1000 people - and sadly not everyone is free to gather this way - but I would love it if blessings I've received from such groups would be multiplied to others. Plus, these small gatherings greatly resemble the way Jesus' followers met with Him and continued to spread the word.

24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25 NIV

"For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20 NIV

Is Fasting 'Just Another Diet'?

Okay I'll admit it, losing a couple pounds over 24 hours is a definite motivator when I fast, but I have noticed other benefits as well. 

A glass of water can help relieve hunger when fasting.

The period I choose begins after breakfast, then I just have liquids until lunch the next day. I like this timing because it only requires one night of fasting instead of two. Sometimes I barely feel hunger while fasting and it passes quickly, while other times I may get a little shaky. Eventually there's a point when my body begins to convert more stored energy from itself instead of food. Skipping only one meal doesn't seem to get me to that point, and often just makes me eat more the next meal. The longer fast is needed, and here are other benefits I notice:

• Even though I only lose a couple pounds fasting, it seems to improve my metabolism for a few days afterward.
• During the fast my appetite settles down, and I realize I am not a 'slave' to food.
• Fasting also shows me how dependant I am on eating for reasons other than hunger. Do I snack to cheer myself up while working? How do I use the extra time while fasting, do I enjoy other things in life when food is absent?
• Fasting allows time for my body to recover from food sensitivities. Apart from this, a break from genetically modified or artificial foods and preservatives might benefit anyone.
• Fasting improves my weight and appearance.
• In addition to my own health, I sometimes dedicate a fast to 'a cause'. To avoid the "I'm fasting so you owe me" attitude, I may instead ask God if there is something He would like me to fast on behalf of.*

I definitely don't fast perfectly, or as regularly as might be best. Sometimes to coax myself, I allow tea in addition to water. Or I may promise myself something special for lunch the next day, as an incentive. For me it's about the willingness to try, and then see what happens.**

*(Isaiah 58:6 NIV) “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?"

**(Matthew 6:16-18 NIV) 16 “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.17 But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, 18 so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Note: I am not a medical professional and this is just my personal experience with fasting, not a recommendation.

If It Could Happen For This Tomato, Why Not Us?

 It didn't look like much at first, just a little tomato plant supported by a chopstick! I wasn't even sure whether to plant it because I'd had dismal results trying to grow one two years ago. The pot kept tipping over, and when the tomatoes began to grow they developed a blight and rotted. Sigh.

So I researched this time, and this is what I learned: apparently you can either use stakes or cages to support tomatoes, or let them sprawl if there is room. Caging helps the whole plant hold itself up, while staking helps keep individual tomatoes off the ground while they grow. Left to itself the tomato can still grow fruit, but may face more challenges touching the ground such as insects or wet soil.

Suddenly I thought "Can you imagine being able to make so much happen, or having an idea so huge that you couldn't easily support it alone?" Sure, I have participated on teams and group projects before, but I never thought about anything large originating from me.
However, if God grows tomatoes from a scrawny plant like the one shown, imagine what he plans for each of us? Or maybe we'd rather be the stakes or supports for someone else's big idea. Either way, the fact remains that great things can grow from small beginnings, when given the right support.

Tomatoes are coming!

" I will look on you with favour and make you fruitful and increase your numbers, and I will keep my covenant with you." Leviticus 26:9

Postscript: When we finally harvested, this single plant produced over 70 tomatoes! Amazing :)

Rx For A Better Life

Karl Marx once said of religion, "It is the opium of the people. The abolition of religion as the illusory happiness of the people is required for their real happiness. The demand to give up the illusion about its condition is the demand to give up a condition which needs illusions." (in "Critique of Hegel’s Philosophy of Right"). 
This seemed to suggest religion is an empty way to calm the emotions and numb the pain like an opiate would, giving an illusory hope of future well-being, and inward ideas that help overlook actual problems.
Calm feelings, peace amidst trials, and hope may indeed accompany spiritual beliefs, but I question this general view about religion for a few reasons;

• First, not all believers are oppressed or economically distressed. Some current (and historical) believers have prospered and lived comfortably.*
• It's notable that oppressive governments tend to persecute rather than promote Christianity. Clearly, they don't believe it creates compliant, sedated individuals who are easy to control, as the term 'opiate' would imply.
• Inward ideas about religion don't always calm the emotions. Some people put a lot at risk when they venture to become a Christian, and may face added persecution.
• Lastly, the idea overlooks actual changes wisdom can bring about. A few really good decisions can alter one's course in life. People who put wisdom into practice experience actual changes, not just abstract ideas that make them hopeful**.

If there really was a pill that could deliver character as Christianity does, people would line the streets to get it! When Christians show character during tough times, it is not because they are in denial about the suffering. It's because they persevere in their faith in spite of it, and this strengthens their relationship with God.***

* Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him. 13 The man became rich, and his wealth continued to grow until he became very wealthy. Genesis 26:12-13 NIV 

** Wisdom is a shelter as money is a shelter, but the advantage of knowledge is this: Wisdom preserves those who have it. Ecclesiastes 7:12 NIV

*** 3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. Romans 5:3-4 NIV

How The Ice Cube Melted

I used to feel so confused by peoples' behaviour, constantly questioning why people did or didn't do certain things. I really wanted to know, but no one would explain it to me. They would listen, then move on to something else.

Had they told me people often acted as they did because of feelings, I would likely have argued the point. I thought we were rational creatures, guided by the mind and ways we were taught to behave.

Then a mentor entered my life who began to ask me about my own feelings, and listen. I thought it odd that she was unnecessarily concerned about such things. But I really liked this person because she took such an interest in me, and her attention felt great.

Over time she helped me work through problems, taught me to treat myself well, and to pay attention to my own feelings. Suddenly the world made more sense to me: whether in constructive or destructive ways, mindfully or not, people were acting on their desires. So was I, and aware of it now I felt more alive, more self esteem, and more capable of loving others.


"And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of our father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind, for the Lord searches every heart and understands every desire and every thought." - 1 Chronicles 28:9 NIV

Yeeee-OUCH!

Physical pain was something I had to deal with for awhile. Oh, I'd had minor things in the past, but this level was something new. When it happened it was like a hammer struck, or I stubbed a toe - times 10! Sometimes when it suddenly, intensely hurt, I heard a stream of swear words pour out of me as I clutched, crumpled, and waited for it to subside. Realizing it was not going to be a one time thing, I began to wonder if I could learn to respond in a better way. When I think of Jesus' suffering, such as when they drove nails through His hands, in my imagination I never envisioned Him swearing. Crying out in pain, perhaps, but not swearing*. So, although anger seems to rise so quickly when I hurt, I am trying to learn to express the pain without the course language. (And today I am grateful that my body has healed, and I feel better). 

^{*Matthew 27:50 NIV  "}And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit."

Life's Seasons Not As Expected

I always thought seasons in life corresponded with our physical growth: spring as youth, summer as adulthood, autumn as middle age, and winter as old age - complete with white hair like snow. This resulted in a somewhat bleak image of old age, and also concerned me because I 
was not prospering when I thought I should be.

However I recently read a description* of the seasons that began with winter, a time when roots spread below the surface in preparation for the future. The author pointed out that there is no harvest during winter. The hard work of planting begins in spring, then summer is characterized by lots of growth and attention, but with minimal harvest. Finally, in autumn there is plenty of harvest achieved with less effort.

I'm not sure our physical environment need be inhospitable for us to experience "winter" in our lives. It can be a time when, try as we might, nothing grows. Or when our enthusiasm or energy are weak. When we are dependant for our provision. The lack of visible results can cause self doubt, and blame from others may cause embarrassment.

Take heart if you find yourself in a period of winter. Spring comes, but like other seasons cannot be forced. In the meantime, it helps to accept that winter happens. Growth beneath the surface prepares us for spring, while kindness comforts those whose lives seem on hold. 
Job 5:26 NIV says "You will come to the grave in full vigour, like sheaves gathered in season." Although death may seem imminent during winter, the person in this scripture lived through it and went on to feel vigorous and reap a harvest before they died. So we have scriptural support that winter can indeed be the beginning of a spiritual journey, and our best days could lie ahead.

* p. 115-116, "Be Yourself, Discover the Life You Were Meant to Live", by John Mason, Baker Publishing Group, 2011.

Saving Private Ryan

Saving Private Ryan is a graphic and intense war movie* about a mission to save a soldier in Normandy during World War II because he is the last survivor of 4 brothers, the other 3 killed in action.
Many of those sent to save him are also killed on the mission to return her last son to the grieving mother.
This film makes me think of the responsibility each of us has to reach each others' families. Often our loved ones don't listen to us about Christianity, but if each of us shares the good news in our own way, the families of those around us might be rescued. I hope someone will reach my brother in time!

And they took offense at him. But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his own town and in his own home.” (Matthew 13:57 NIV)

*Released in 1998 by Dreamworks and Paramount Pictures

Why Are There So Many Singers?

It seems odd to me that so many people can sing. And many others are able to play music, paint, dance, write, or act - yet there are so few jobs that engage these talents.  I've heard that only 2% of those capable of singing get to work professionally in this field. How puzzling that so many people would be equipped with talents that seemingly are not needed.  
And yet, our spiritual commission is to carry the gospel throughout the world. I can't help but wonder if the pleasure the arts provide was so people would carry and hear the message with great enjoyment.

Mark 16:15 NIV  He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation."

What Is This Boat's Secret?

Anchored with a plain yellow rope down into the lake, a small aluminum boat covered with a blue tarp bobs in the waves off the shore. Floating there for hours, it detracts from the view of the popular pier nearby. But that little boat was built for speed, and would be fun in spite of it's plain appearance.

Many folks fit that description too. They may not keep up with the newest ideas or fit into flashy surroundings, but they often have gifts that are really a blessing if you give them a chance to shine.

Acts 4:13 NIV  "When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus."

Green and Growing

It's a plant the height of a seedling, but with thick stems and large leaves. In the past it grew lanky, so I cut off the healthy parts, rooted and replanted them. The old growth was discarded along with the crusted old pot, and a new glass one gave it a modern fresh look. 

I usually think of pruning as getting rid of new irregular shoots, but sometimes I keep that part and start over because it's where growth is more vigorous and the leaves most healthy. 

I think people usually have healthy areas of their lives to focus on when a fresh start is needed too. We may trim back to our original roots, or eliminate old growth in favour of a thriving, new direction.

Isaiah 20:21-22
²¹ 21 Then all your people will be righteous and they will possess the land forever.
They are the shoot I have planted, the work of my hands, for the display of my splendor.
²² 22 The least of you will become a thousand, the smallest a mighty nation.
I am the Lord; in its time I will do this swiftly.”

Bug Guts

I plunge my microfibre cloth back into the warm soapy water, then work some more on the bug-splattered bumper and insect body parts wedged in the grill. As I scrub I think of my life, working hard to remove the scraps and bits from past injuries, my support group a sort of graveyard for lost souls like those on the bumper of this car. 
Not that I was completely finished, but parts of my life - my youth, my marriage, my early dreams - were dashed to pieces by the unstoppable force of a family member's drinking. Our capacity to heal is amazing, however. With the parts still intact, I learned to avoid more collisions and to gently comfort those still clinging to difficult relationships.

Psalm 34:18 NIV: The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Socks Disappear, But Mugs Multiply!

Cups used to multiply in my cupboard; ones with company logos, funny sayings, photographs and verses. Some arrived full of candy and wrapped in cellophane, others were earned, adopted, or left by former roommates. As such, they were full of stories and memories - even while empty - and I felt responsible to honor the memories by keeping those cups, even though at times I felt embarrassed by their unmatched informality.
Recently, I decided to have cups that were selected, and realized some of my old cups didn't even represent things I wanted to remember. So, I got rid of a few.
My new mugs are large ones in muted, solid colours: burgundy, blue, beige, grey. They are peaceful, replaceable, and chosen. I still keep a few mementos around, but they're not just what life handed me - they're what I chose to have and keep.

⁵ Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. (Psalm 16:5 NIV)

Too Little to Love?

Perched high in a tree, it's nose and feet are pinkish as though made to look like a child's stuffed toy. But the eyes of the opossum are not like a domestic animal, they have the determination of a creature that must always be vigilant, - for food, for predators, and even to maintain balance climbing trees.
I notice life does not always favour the tiny and cute, they can be stricken by the same ills that befall others. One might think because of their small stature and appeal that the Lord would spare them trials. The world, on the other hand, preaches survival of the fittest.  But if that were entirely true only large, brutish creatures would remain and our delicate species would have vanished. So while the small may not be favoured, neither are they ignored, but are given their needs just as all are provided for by God.

Luke 12:6

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.

Serious Fun

Dressed in businesslike black, my camera has many symbols in addition to the "Auto" one in green, for the curious to research and the artist to explore. And both would be pleased, the technical mind for the camera's precision and specs, and the creative mind for the excellent results achieved from those same features. 
Sometimes fun comes in lighthearted and silly ways, but I enjoy my camera though it is serious and complex. Likewise, a serious-minded person can bring enjoyment to others by their dedication to careful, precise work. And, unlike the camera, this work also deepens their personal satisfaction.

^{Titus 2:7-8 NIV  7} In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness ⁸ and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

Big Church, Little Church

I have this idea that proper Christians drive minivans to church every Sunday with their families. Or are seniors with grown families, who mingle looking for newcomers to welcome into the fold. Churched youngsters marry early so as not to 'burn with passion', and they take on adult responsibilities early by starting a family. And that worship means singing, period.
Where do these stereotypes come from? Of course I fit none of them, and secretly feel ashamed for this. Divorced with no children, remarried, no success to speak of, and - wait, I do drive an SUV. Perhaps worst of all, I don't attend 'regular' church. I attend small group Bible studies and a Christian writers' group, study Christian books, watch occasional Christian TV shows, and socialize with Christian friends. I tried so hard to fit in at church, but I don't like to sing and dread mingling after the service. I like sermons, but most services are held in the morning before I feel alert enough to socialize.
So does this make me a bad Christian? I have unfortunately read books that suggest so. However, the Bible is not one of them. Sure I have failures in my life, but failing to meet or connect with Christians is not among them, even if it is not in a large, crowded setting.

²⁰ For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20 (NIV)