Hope Inn

I was sketching this motel for fun and named it Hope Inn because I've been thinking about that topic lately.

I used to feel optimistic about most things, like job interviews and dating for example.  Sure I felt nervous, but opportunities often seemed to work out. Over time, however, my feelings began to change. The positive outcomes didn't always remain positive.

After several such changes, I began to lose confidence in things working out. Gradually my past mistakes led me to become more cautious, like the person in Proverbs 26:13 NIV who says, “There’s a lion in the road, a fierce lion roaming the streets!” Not literally a lion of course, but various dangers. For example, as mentioned in a prior post, I was troubled watching the news. Though statistically news events may be rare, they show awful things that happen to ordinary people.  I realized my stress was a problem from scriptures like this one: "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind" (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV). Yet, night and day, anxious thoughts could trouble me and despite much prayer and effort, I was not sure how to change the way I felt.

Then one day after journaling about my concerns, I suddenly began to write line after line and page after page, starting with "I hope..."! Since then, I try to counter fearful, anxious thoughts with what I hope could happen instead. After all, best case scenarios are possible too.

I never imagined "hope" would require such effort and determination though. Anxiety can surface like a bad habit, while forcing my thoughts from imminent fears to "wishful thinking" still feels unnatural. However, with practise it gets easier and I'm starting to discover that many hopes actually come to pass.

These scriptures help assure me that hope is both a sign of growth, and a good choice:

Romans 5:3-5 (NKJV)  3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; 4 and perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

Proverbs 10:24 (NIV) What the wicked dread will overtake them; what the righteous desire will be granted.

Disaster, With a Chance Of Rain.

One night I watched the news for a few minutes before bed, and felt so troubled afterward I wasn't sure I could sleep! Then I changed channels to check the weather forecast, and saw disasters happening around the world. Even when I avoid the news for awhile, I still hear heart wrenching stories from people around me, which add to my own worries. Yet I know the Lord wants me to love others, so how can I maintain faith and hope in the face of risks, disasters, and tragedies like we hear about each day? And how can I stop worrying when there is so much that can go wrong?

One way I interrupt troubled thoughts is to use this verse:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8 NIV. 

It helps to choose each word and think about something that fits that description. For example, can I think of something "admirable"?

Also I consider these 2 scriptures, and what they mean to me when read together:

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 NIV

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 NIV

So I remind myself that God rewards those who earnestly seek him, and works in all things for the good of those who love him. When facing a bad situation, I say to myself "God will bring good out of this." Granted, thinking it does not always make me 'feel' the certainty I would like to! But as I begin to align my thinking with the scriptures I will see examples of it happen, then more faith will grow.

Why Some People Stop Believing

I recently watched a documentary about clergy people who are apostate, who formerly had faith but no longer believe in the supernatural aspect of Christianity - which of course means they no longer believe in God. Some continued to perform their clergy jobs in secret or defiance, others joined humanist or atheist movements, and some missed the fellowship of church life and started Sunday gatherings like church services without reference to God or the Bible. I watched this wary of deception, but curious about what caused their loss of faith.
One idea expressed was this: "If there is a loving God, why would He allow this ________________  (fill in blank with something awful witnessed or experienced) to happen? Since [awful things] happen, I don't believe in God." Their thinking had led them to judge God, rather than the other way around. Some chose a humanist view, believing in the value of fallible but visible humans, while God was blamed or dismissed for not stopping evil as if this were an evil in itself, or proof of non-existence.
I admit that when fears and horrors arise, it can be hard to sense that God is present or responding to prayer. And yet, I've never read a scripture that says "everything will be perfect on earth all the time, and by the good fortune of everyone there, you will know God exists." This is not heaven, it is earth! Rather than disproving God's existence, these actually prove EXACTLY what the Bible talks about - that sin exists. We are warned that man is sinful, and that other unseen evil forces are also at work here encouraging this.
I believe that God has the power to stop whatever He wants to. He created it all, and it is within His ability to end or control it all, or parts of it. Many times, for example, God intervenes and people are guided to safety*, or obstacles stop sinful acts from being carried out.
Other times He does not intervene, and far be it from me to presume to answer why. It could be that a greater good we don't know or appreciate will result from the event, or perhaps that God has built in certain bodily responses during trauma or dying that prevent it from being unbearable and unending, despite being frightening to witness.
I hope fear and disappointment never derail my faith (or yours). I hope that we pray often enough in good times that God's blessings strengthen our faith, so that when challenging times come the gratitude in our spirit does not give up to the doubts in our mind.

* Matthew 2:13 NIV [ The Escape to Egypt ] "When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. “Get up,” he said, “take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him.”

Psalm 14:1 NIV [ For the director of music. Of David. ] "The fool says in his heart, “There is no God.” They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good."

Rx For A Better Life

Karl Marx once said of religion, "It is the opium of the people. The abolition of religion as the illusory happiness of the people is required for their real happiness. The demand to give up the illusion about its condition is the demand to give up a condition which needs illusions." (in "Critique of Hegel’s Philosophy of Right"). 
This seemed to suggest religion is an empty way to calm the emotions and numb the pain like an opiate would, giving an illusory hope of future well-being, and inward ideas that help overlook actual problems.
Calm feelings, peace amidst trials, and hope may indeed accompany spiritual beliefs, but I question this general view about religion for a few reasons;

• First, not all believers are oppressed or economically distressed. Some current (and historical) believers have prospered and lived comfortably.*
• It's notable that oppressive governments tend to persecute rather than promote Christianity. Clearly, they don't believe it creates compliant, sedated individuals who are easy to control, as the term 'opiate' would imply.
• Inward ideas about religion don't always calm the emotions. Some people put a lot at risk when they venture to become a Christian, and may face added persecution.
• Lastly, the idea overlooks actual changes wisdom can bring about. A few really good decisions can alter one's course in life. People who put wisdom into practice experience actual changes, not just abstract ideas that make them hopeful**.

If there really was a pill that could deliver character as Christianity does, people would line the streets to get it! When Christians show character during tough times, it is not because they are in denial about the suffering. It's because they persevere in their faith in spite of it, and this strengthens their relationship with God.***

* Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him. 13 The man became rich, and his wealth continued to grow until he became very wealthy. Genesis 26:12-13 NIV 

** Wisdom is a shelter as money is a shelter, but the advantage of knowledge is this: Wisdom preserves those who have it. Ecclesiastes 7:12 NIV

*** 3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. Romans 5:3-4 NIV

Bug Guts

I plunge my microfibre cloth back into the warm soapy water, then work some more on the bug-splattered bumper and insect body parts wedged in the grill. As I scrub I think of my life, working hard to remove the scraps and bits from past injuries, my support group a sort of graveyard for lost souls like those on the bumper of this car. 
Not that I was completely finished, but parts of my life - my youth, my marriage, my early dreams - were dashed to pieces by the unstoppable force of a family member's drinking. Our capacity to heal is amazing, however. With the parts still intact, I learned to avoid more collisions and to gently comfort those still clinging to difficult relationships.

Psalm 34:18 NIV: The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Too Little to Love?

Perched high in a tree, it's nose and feet are pinkish as though made to look like a child's stuffed toy. But the eyes of the opossum are not like a domestic animal, they have the determination of a creature that must always be vigilant, - for food, for predators, and even to maintain balance climbing trees.
I notice life does not always favour the tiny and cute, they can be stricken by the same ills that befall others. One might think because of their small stature and appeal that the Lord would spare them trials. The world, on the other hand, preaches survival of the fittest.  But if that were entirely true only large, brutish creatures would remain and our delicate species would have vanished. So while the small may not be favoured, neither are they ignored, but are given their needs just as all are provided for by God.

Luke 12:6

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.

Sidelined

One of my biggest worries is that I will die before I ever really make a contribution. I have had jobs and businesses, but never really "connected" in a long term way. Sometimes the work benefits others, but I feel unfulfilled. Or it pleases me, but I fail to successfully enter the marketplace.

I wonder how many introverted people play or sing beautiful music in private, that no one else ever hears. I taught my dog around 20 tricks and she deserves a spotlight, but her master avoids it. And I was once at a memorial service where a collection of lovely, small paintings were stacked on the edge of a table for us to look through, piled like napkins instead of framed and appreciated for the quality they were.

Similarly, many of my introverted friends are intelligent, but unemployed. Instead of being welcomed into decision-making positions and lauded for their thoughtfulness, they worry about their futures, struggle to get interviews, and take positions beneath their abilities. They are looked down upon by people to whom 'success' comes more easily. They are misunderstood, judged, and set aside.

Yes, there are famous introverted people. In every group there are exceptions, but we are generally disdained for our quiet, thoughtful, careful ways.

And worst of all we blame ourselves. Even those who write about traits related to introversion often tell how to 'cope' instead of thrive and celebrate. The gist seems to be "stop apologizing", which is helpful but still short of "start living". And I don't know the answer either, but I guess awareness and acceptance precede action.

The stress takes its toll on my health and my confidence. "Who do you think you are?" sounds off as soon as I square my shoulders. I guess it doesn't matter who we all think we are, for a generation may come and go without knowing the difference we could have made if everyone were appreciated and engaged in suitable roles. The lacklustre performance I have made in talkative, selling jobs will be mirrored in the under performance of extroverted people making quick, confidant, and well-promoted decisions in corporations and churches that should be undertaken with more thought and vision.

While I discover I am not alone in my introversion, I also notice many of us are benched or sidelined, even when the game requires the exact qualities we have.

And, I am disappointed. I am designed to be a servant like everybody else and we deserve not just a chance, but also the respect and excitement about our abilities that others receive. And true, not everyone else receives it either, but at least they are in the game.

Wisdom Is Better Than Strength

"In her new book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, author Susan Cain ... argues that over the past century there has been a  shift in society, from a culture of character to a culture of personality."*

It reminds me of a story in Ecclesiastes 9:15-16 NIV  "Now there lived in that city a man poor but wise, and he saved the city by his wisdom. But nobody remembered that poor man. So I said, "Wisdom is better than strength." But the poor man's wisdom is despised, and his words are no longer heeded."

Even today it seems like wisdom is more welcome coming from wealthy people. We listen to celebrities, for example, because of their fame and success. What a relief that God not only loves the popular, but delights to give character to any who seek Him.

* excerpt from "Introverts No Longer the Quiet Followers of Extroverts", by Carl Moore and Rebecca Black, www.forbes.com, 8/22/2012

The Word

Communication is so important. One means of oppression is to limit communication with others. This occurs when abusers alienate individuals from their friends and families, or authorities isolate nations from the rest of the world, restricting access to media and controlling what is published and broadcast *. Conversely, when people freely communicate they can solve problems and share knowledge, information, wisdom and truth.


* The following verse reminds me of the situation in Cuba (2012): Job 20:19 NIV "For he [the wicked] has oppressed the poor and left them destitute; he has seized houses he did not build."
Per Wikipedia "Cuba had the second-highest number of imprisoned journalists of any nation in 2008 (the People's Republic of China had the highest) according to various sources, including the Committee to Protect Journalists (CPJ), an international NGO, and Human Rights Watch."