The Best Way Forward

Houseplants are common, but I recently realized I've owned this one since 1991... it has been around for more than half my life!

I discovered it left on the shelves at my (then) new office in an icecream pail, and wanting my space to look more professional I transplanted it to a nicer pot that my mother had stored in her basement. When I left that job a couple years later, the plant came along and has been with me since. 

Though we begin things with good intentions, we never know what will last. "Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let your hands not be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well." (Ecclesiastes 11:6) 

Sometimes the path to follow will seem clear to us, especially if we invite God to help with our decisions: "This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go." (Isaiah 48:17) 

At other times it's hard to discern the best way forward, but this should not stop us from trying. "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps." (Proverbs 16:9) and "Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails." (Proverbs 19:21). So even if our plans happen to point us in the wrong direction, the Lord will be involved in the outcome. For Christians, this can reassure us that we will never stray far off if we stay in relationship with God. For people who don't want His involvement, it may be a more cautionary verse - but still applies. 

There is yet another thing we can do to make our plans more successful: "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."(Proverbs 15:22). So it is wise to run our ideas past someone else before we proceed with them. 

In summary, I never imagined this plant would outlast the job I had, the career I spent years pursuing, and the business I worked for back then. Nor did I ever think I would be writing about it years later. It seems the Lord had quite different purposes in mind for me than I planned for. So imagine a good future, talk to others and pray about it, and then begin to move forward. The Lord will either establish your steps, or intervene and redirect you in a new direction if that is what's best.

 * All references from the NIV

Hope Inn

I was sketching this motel for fun and named it Hope Inn because I've been thinking about that topic lately.

I used to feel optimistic about most things, like job interviews and dating for example.  Sure I felt nervous, but opportunities often seemed to work out. Over time, however, my feelings began to change. The positive outcomes didn't always remain positive.

After several such changes, I began to lose confidence in things working out. Gradually my past mistakes led me to become more cautious, like the person in Proverbs 26:13 NIV who says, “There’s a lion in the road, a fierce lion roaming the streets!” Not literally a lion of course, but various dangers. For example, as mentioned in a prior post, I was troubled watching the news. Though statistically news events may be rare, they show awful things that happen to ordinary people.  I realized my stress was a problem from scriptures like this one: "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind" (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV). Yet, night and day, anxious thoughts could trouble me and despite much prayer and effort, I was not sure how to change the way I felt.

Then one day after journaling about my concerns, I suddenly began to write line after line and page after page, starting with "I hope..."! Since then, I try to counter fearful, anxious thoughts with what I hope could happen instead. After all, best case scenarios are possible too.

I never imagined "hope" would require such effort and determination though. Anxiety can surface like a bad habit, while forcing my thoughts from imminent fears to "wishful thinking" still feels unnatural. However, with practise it gets easier and I'm starting to discover that many hopes actually come to pass.

These scriptures help assure me that hope is both a sign of growth, and a good choice:

Romans 5:3-5 (NKJV)  3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; 4 and perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

Proverbs 10:24 (NIV) What the wicked dread will overtake them; what the righteous desire will be granted.

Disaster, With a Chance Of Rain.

One night I watched the news for a few minutes before bed, and felt so troubled afterward I wasn't sure I could sleep! Then I changed channels to check the weather forecast, and saw disasters happening around the world. Even when I avoid the news for awhile, I still hear heart wrenching stories from people around me, which add to my own worries. Yet I know the Lord wants me to love others, so how can I maintain faith and hope in the face of risks, disasters, and tragedies like we hear about each day? And how can I stop worrying when there is so much that can go wrong?

One way I interrupt troubled thoughts is to use this verse:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8 NIV. 

It helps to choose each word and think about something that fits that description. For example, can I think of something "admirable"?

Also I consider these 2 scriptures, and what they mean to me when read together:

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 NIV

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 NIV

So I remind myself that God rewards those who earnestly seek him, and works in all things for the good of those who love him. When facing a bad situation, I say to myself "God will bring good out of this." Granted, thinking it does not always make me 'feel' the certainty I would like to! But as I begin to align my thinking with the scriptures I will see examples of it happen, then more faith will grow.

It Happens In Thousands of Livingrooms!

"If you only had one week to live, and could write something guaranteed to impact 1000 people, what would you write?" This question was posed at a writers' workshop I attended, and this was my response: "I would write about Bible Study groups, and why I like them so much". As an introvert they really suit my style, and here is why:

• I like to learn, and as the name implies these studies focus in-depth on topics or sections of the Bible. Excellent study guides and videos are also available for leaders and members which encourage participation and consistency.
• Study groups are often small, which makes it comfortable to interact and share. It's fun to hear spiritual insights from others.
• It's encouraging to hear others pray aloud and pray with them. I learn from this too.
• Often groups meet in homes, which can strengthen friendships.
• Whether a collection is taken is up to the group, and many do not.
• There's always something new to study regardless how long a group meets, whether for a season or years.
• I find it easier to invite a friend to a small group than to a large church service. 
• For a change of pace, invite someone to share their testimony as a speaker.
• Bible studies are a way to find wisdom, solve problems, gain insight, and feel loved by God and others.

I don't know whether this will impact 1000 people - and sadly not everyone is free to gather this way - but I would love it if blessings I've received from such groups would be multiplied to others. Plus, these small gatherings greatly resemble the way Jesus' followers met with Him and continued to spread the word.

24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. - Hebrews 10:24-25 NIV

"For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20 NIV

A Present From The Past

I actually forgot I asked for it until the gift arrived, but once I saw it I knew just who it was from.
As Christmas was approaching, I thought often about my mom. It was a few years ago that she died, after a prolonged illness. The condition had slowly affected her muscles to the point that she couldn't walk, speak, focus her eyes, or finally even swallow. However she could still smile and squeeze my hand, to show she loved me.
As I grew up, she was the one who decorated our house, bought us lovely presents, and made delicious Christmas dinners. Not in a pretentious way either, that wasn't Mom. More in a loving, faithful way. But as her illness took those abilities from her, our family each did what they could to continue the gatherings.
But this year, my memory of Mom in earlier times seemed less clear. So privately, I asked God to make her memory more vivid. I had no idea how this could happen - through a dream perhaps? And as I got busier preparing for Christmas, I soon forgot my request.
Christmas Day arrived, and we were visiting my family when my brother invited me to watch a video on his computer. "Here is something I'm giving you", he said. The short clip was originally filmed to send our Christmas wishes to my niece in 2007, when she couldn't come home. As the camera panned across the room, each of us gave a little wave and our greeting. The end of the video focused on Mom, seated in her wheelchair. Dad said "C'mon Grandma, ..." and she turned, looked right into the camera, smiled, waved, and said Merry Christmas!
We were all moved watching it, and my heart was touched even more when I recalled my prayer, and recognized this beautiful gift was the answer.

9 “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! Matthew 7:9-11 NIV

How The Ice Cube Melted

I used to feel so confused by peoples' behaviour, constantly questioning why people did or didn't do certain things. I really wanted to know, but no one would explain it to me. They would listen, then move on to something else.

Had they told me people often acted as they did because of feelings, I would likely have argued the point. I thought we were rational creatures, guided by the mind and ways we were taught to behave.

Then a mentor entered my life who began to ask me about my own feelings, and listen. I thought it odd that she was unnecessarily concerned about such things. But I really liked this person because she took such an interest in me, and her attention felt great.

Over time she helped me work through problems, taught me to treat myself well, and to pay attention to my own feelings. Suddenly the world made more sense to me: whether in constructive or destructive ways, mindfully or not, people were acting on their desires. So was I, and aware of it now I felt more alive, more self esteem, and more capable of loving others.


"And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of our father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind, for the Lord searches every heart and understands every desire and every thought." - 1 Chronicles 28:9 NIV

Yeeee-OUCH!

Physical pain was something I had to deal with for awhile. Oh, I'd had minor things in the past, but this level was something new. When it happened it was like a hammer struck, or I stubbed a toe - times 10! Sometimes when it suddenly, intensely hurt, I heard a stream of swear words pour out of me as I clutched, crumpled, and waited for it to subside. Realizing it was not going to be a one time thing, I began to wonder if I could learn to respond in a better way. When I think of Jesus' suffering, such as when they drove nails through His hands, in my imagination I never envisioned Him swearing. Crying out in pain, perhaps, but not swearing*. So, although anger seems to rise so quickly when I hurt, I am trying to learn to express the pain without the course language. (And today I am grateful that my body has healed, and I feel better). 

^{*Matthew 27:50 NIV  "}And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit."

Shopping for Souvenirs

I browsed a rack covered with small pins in a souvenir store. Not collector pins, but ones with brash little sayings about marijuana, rock music, and beer -inexpensive bait for the frugal tourist shopper. Among them I noticed one that said "Jesus loves you, but I'm his favourite". Seeing this among the others did bring to mind some interesting questions. Apart from that - and being his favourite - I purchased the pin!
Of course, it's not really accurate, "for God does not show favouritism" (Romans 2:11 NIV). Yet it touches on a lovely idea: each believer being so loved that they all feel like His favourite. To me, the teasing humour also conveys "Jesus loves you" to readers in a disarming way. At least I hope it's disarming, like all humour it could be misinterpreted. But my hope is it will convey this idea, and also bring a smile.

Water, Water Everywhere, But Not a Drop To Drink

What is the point of writing, I wondered, when there are already so many words? Books have been written, article after article, daily news stories, and now billions of words added daily online. Writing seems as useful as spitting into the ocean.
But then I considered water: even though it is common enough to cover the earth, it's not all drinkable. The largest bodies of water are too salty. Even when floods appear, the water becomes contaminated by dirt and ruined objects. And there are still places where droughts happen, though nature continuously recirculates water through evaporation to move, restore and refresh it. And even fresh rain can be contaminated in air by man's pollution.
Like drops of water, many words out there do not bring life. They discourage, frighten, deceive or mislead. It's not just water that's needed but fresh, living water, and it is not just words that are needed, but life-giving words.

"For the Scriptures declare that rivers of living water shall flow from the inmost being of anyone who believes in me." John 7:38 (TLB)

Title based on quote from Samuel Taylor Coleridge in "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner"

Saving Private Ryan

Saving Private Ryan is a graphic and intense war movie* about a mission to save a soldier in Normandy during World War II because he is the last survivor of 4 brothers, the other 3 killed in action.
Many of those sent to save him are also killed on the mission to return her last son to the grieving mother.
This film makes me think of the responsibility each of us has to reach each others' families. Often our loved ones don't listen to us about Christianity, but if each of us shares the good news in our own way, the families of those around us might be rescued. I hope someone will reach my brother in time!

And they took offense at him. But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his own town and in his own home.” (Matthew 13:57 NIV)

*Released in 1998 by Dreamworks and Paramount Pictures

Why Are There So Many Singers?

It seems odd to me that so many people can sing. And many others are able to play music, paint, dance, write, or act - yet there are so few jobs that engage these talents.  I've heard that only 2% of those capable of singing get to work professionally in this field. How puzzling that so many people would be equipped with talents that seemingly are not needed.  
And yet, our spiritual commission is to carry the gospel throughout the world. I can't help but wonder if the pleasure the arts provide was so people would carry and hear the message with great enjoyment.

Mark 16:15 NIV  He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation."

Sidelined

One of my biggest worries is that I will die before I ever really make a contribution. I have had jobs and businesses, but never really "connected" in a long term way. Sometimes the work benefits others, but I feel unfulfilled. Or it pleases me, but I fail to successfully enter the marketplace.

I wonder how many introverted people play or sing beautiful music in private, that no one else ever hears. I taught my dog around 20 tricks and she deserves a spotlight, but her master avoids it. And I was once at a memorial service where a collection of lovely, small paintings were stacked on the edge of a table for us to look through, piled like napkins instead of framed and appreciated for the quality they were.

Similarly, many of my introverted friends are intelligent, but unemployed. Instead of being welcomed into decision-making positions and lauded for their thoughtfulness, they worry about their futures, struggle to get interviews, and take positions beneath their abilities. They are looked down upon by people to whom 'success' comes more easily. They are misunderstood, judged, and set aside.

Yes, there are famous introverted people. In every group there are exceptions, but we are generally disdained for our quiet, thoughtful, careful ways.

And worst of all we blame ourselves. Even those who write about traits related to introversion often tell how to 'cope' instead of thrive and celebrate. The gist seems to be "stop apologizing", which is helpful but still short of "start living". And I don't know the answer either, but I guess awareness and acceptance precede action.

The stress takes its toll on my health and my confidence. "Who do you think you are?" sounds off as soon as I square my shoulders. I guess it doesn't matter who we all think we are, for a generation may come and go without knowing the difference we could have made if everyone were appreciated and engaged in suitable roles. The lacklustre performance I have made in talkative, selling jobs will be mirrored in the under performance of extroverted people making quick, confidant, and well-promoted decisions in corporations and churches that should be undertaken with more thought and vision.

While I discover I am not alone in my introversion, I also notice many of us are benched or sidelined, even when the game requires the exact qualities we have.

And, I am disappointed. I am designed to be a servant like everybody else and we deserve not just a chance, but also the respect and excitement about our abilities that others receive. And true, not everyone else receives it either, but at least they are in the game.

Energy: A Word Widely Misused

Energy is appealing for many reasons: it is invisible but we understand how it feels, it relates to strength and power, and it is desirable to have it. People use the word "energy" in many contexts, such as the way 'it' flows around a room, or the way someone makes them feel when they are nearby. Sometimes people use this concept as a substitute for God. Like God, energy is powerful, invisible but present, felt more at certain times than others, and desirable to have within us. But it lacks personality, unlike God who exercises choice, feels emotion, and wants a relationship with us*. God is never described merely as energy in the Bible.


*Psalm 4:3a (CEB) "Know this: the Lord takes personal care of the faithful."

Not Feeling Good Enough to Pray?

Sometimes life leads us down roads we never expected. Have you ever started something you felt bad about, but didn't want to stop? When I was younger, I was surprised to discover that some of the things people warned me about were ... well, fun. How could this be - if sin is bad, shouldn't it hurt? The simple answer is, it can feel good and hurt you (or others) at the same time. That is why it is so hard to stop, and why people warn us not to begin.


When I find myself on the 'wrong side' of this dilemma, I still maintain my relationship with God. People may judge me, and I need not convince anyone I am right or wrong. I pray about what I have done, or am about to do. Why kid myself, God knows my intentions? And I invite him to intervene, and confess my inability to stop. We don't have to be perfect to come before God, or no one would qualify. But thanks to Jesus' work on the cross, we still have access to communicate with God.


Romans 7:19 NIV "For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing."

The Word

Communication is so important. One means of oppression is to limit communication with others. This occurs when abusers alienate individuals from their friends and families, or authorities isolate nations from the rest of the world, restricting access to media and controlling what is published and broadcast *. Conversely, when people freely communicate they can solve problems and share knowledge, information, wisdom and truth.


* The following verse reminds me of the situation in Cuba (2012): Job 20:19 NIV "For he [the wicked] has oppressed the poor and left them destitute; he has seized houses he did not build."
Per Wikipedia "Cuba had the second-highest number of imprisoned journalists of any nation in 2008 (the People's Republic of China had the highest) according to various sources, including the Committee to Protect Journalists (CPJ), an international NGO, and Human Rights Watch."